


Natural,Healthy, and Sane

by orphan_account



Category: Homestuck, MS Paint Adventures
Genre: Dark fic, M/M, Slight descent into insanity
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-03-06
Updated: 2013-03-06
Packaged: 2017-12-04 12:15:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,078
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/710680
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The game was a good thing.</p>
<p>It was natural.</p>
<p>And healthy.</p>
<p>And sane.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Natural,Healthy, and Sane

The game was a good thing.

Inhale,

Exhale,

Repeat until calm.

Inhale,

Exhale.

The game was a good thing.

You have lived longer than the longest you could have ever hoped or expected, you have lived longer than the highest of high bloods.

 And so has everyone else, but only because you haven't lived at all.

 Inhale, exhale.

The game was a good thing.

It was natural.

And healthy.

And sane.

 

-

_Inhale_.

-

You are only here at the order of the would be Empress, you're only here because you all played God.

 This is natural, you remember, you know you should be dead now, you know that you are dead but you also know that this wasn't the nothing and the emptiness that you were promised.

-

_Exhale_.

-

Or at least not in the form you expected.

You see, the end was just the beginning, that empty nothing had come to you once: your goggles shattered inwards, your eyes were gouged and your brain punctured. A brilliantly stupid and dense mind shut down, unfortunately not for good.

The last you remembered were maroon tears and shrill screams in a language you never cared to understand, for fear to learn something unwanted, for fear to learn that he wasn't yours just as much as he wasn't hers, that the breeze once played you both for fools, staying oddly immutable despite its nature.

But what did all that matter when there were twin needles stuck fast in your eyes?

-

_Inhale_.

-

You feel more comfortable in the Void than you ever had been in his arms.

But your first gaze into the abyss is interrupted by a shock of bright blue and the sight of violet towers outside.

You had heard of a place like this, but in tones of yellow and gold, you heard of a never ending expanse of golden towers where the air was free and the clouds all seeing.

-

_Exhale_.

-

You heard of him being so happy that you couldn't help yourself from the bitter disappointment of not waking up there as well.

(Prospit would look great in ruins.)

This was just your bedroom, minus your head pinned to the wall, plus a whole lot of monochrome.

Derse is doomed to be a place of passage for you, having never woken up before in here your only goal is to return to the land of of the living.

But it was a healthy part of the game.

-

_Inhale_

-

"She was the one who kissed you" - Rufioh tells you, probably the first coherent words you heard from him since you flew back from Derse to your room perigees before.

You already knew of course, you'd seen for yourself how the corpse had been left untouched save for the marks of maroon lipstick.

Not that you paid them much heed, you had wanted to leave and the only reason you didn't was just that while you could live with the violet clothing, your goggles had acquired a rosy tint in death that wouldn't do.

You wanted the unfiltered harsh colors of reality, as seen from your still slightly bloody and lensless goggles.

But you saw that there was no way he could have helped you paralyzed from the neck down in the other side of the room anyway and your bravado crumbles.

 The doubt about whether he would even have wanted to remains however, losing a matesprit when you had one too many couldn't have been too bad.

"I'm sorry I never told you about us being matesprits... I would have tried to juggle quadrants but... you see how things are crazy as shit with Meenah and her... it would bring forth more trouble than it was worth..."

You crack a smile - "It could have spared me a dreamself, Nitram." - sarcasm wasn't something you lent yourself to that often, it makes itself known by the slight quirk in your lips, turns your tone haughtier and condescending but it feels deserved right now.

"You could have avoided playing at least me for a fool Rufioh. I didn't sign up to be the other troll." - it would be sweeps until this lesson was written down in stone by Leijon, but grinning was easier when you hurt.

"I _was_ going to tell you but-"

"But you hadn't been caught yet, had you?"

You continue to push the wheelchair and Rufioh returns to silence.

 Something tugs at your mind.

-

_Exhale_

-

When you meet her now, without having your defenses down from confusion and afterglow and something in your eyes, you actually tower over her, not to the point where you feel safe but you do recognize that all in all, it was an unpleasant experience for everyone involved, and more than ordinary pity, you feel respect for the red blooded troll.

Perhaps a slow simmering hate even.

You and Rufioh were only the start of a slight killing spree, but between your dreamself, Rufioh's injury and Meenah's own revival it was wildly ineffective.

Although enough to outcast her even further than the language barrier had.

Hello, horse man - reads a piece of paper she gives you, it's written in actual Beforean.

"Much obliged for sparing us both from your low class gibberish Megido" - you say, examining the index card, it has a frankly adorable drawing of a ram on the side, its hoof prints as a border, perhaps a memento of simpler times.

She snatches it back, writes "Ha ha" under the previous text and almost returns it before adding "You were better company dead."

Her face is as stony as yours, were you in a more romantic mood you'd say it doesn't suit her.

"You could have kept it that way."

"Someone has to pick up the pieces. And it won't be me." reads the card.

-

_Your breath catches. Inhale_

-

You're not sure if you even loved the troll anymore, if you _could_ even love the troll anymore.

But the others did, fragments that came to you in the not so empty dark of your sleep, amongst monsters and horrors that could (and would) be part of you as well.

One galloped freely, _Hello again My Love_ , it said, _Join me, I'll make you as handsome a beast as I should be_.

Picking up the pieces was just as easy as a quick blow to the head and machine parts, you found.

Repairing your goggles and obscuring your vision was that easy as well.

-

  _Exhale slowly,_

 -

It feels natural

and healthy

and sane.


End file.
